Vicar in attack on mourner tributes

A LEADING Tunbridge Wells clergyman has been branded "insensitive" after unleashing a scathing attack on modern funerals.

Father Ed Tomlinson, of St Barnabas' Church, Quarry Road, said he had better ways of spending his time than at crematorium services where the dead were "led in by the tunes of Tina Turner...and sent into the furnace with 'I Did It My Way' blaring out across the speakers".

The vicar whose blogsite rants attract a cult following, said the widespread fashion for "a poem from nan combined with a saccharine message from a pop star before being popped in the oven" left him feeling like an unwanted guest at many funerals.

He added: "I have... stood at the 'crem' like a lemon, wondering why on earth I am present."

But Denise Cantor-Kaydar of CRUSE Bereavement Care, which offers advice and support to anyone affected by a death, criticised the holy man's rant.

"These remarks are pretty insensitive," she said.

"Bereavement isn't funny. We all mourn in different ways and try to select the kind of burial the person would have wanted."

Mr Tomlinson, whose own Anglo-Catholic church offers full requiem mass with candles and incense, added: "Many families I have conducted funerals for have absolutely no desire for any Christian content whatsoever. To be brutally honest, I can think of a hundred better ways of spending my time as a priest."

Claiming modern ceremonies have been taken over by humanists and "ancient crumbling clerics" who will do whatever they are asked, Mr Tomlinson said: "Pastoral care is being left in the hands of those whose main aim is to make money."

However a spokesman for the British Humanist Association charity, which regularly conducts non-religious funerals in Tunbridge Wells, said: "Being funnelled into a ritual where you're saying goodbye to someone you've loved, in words you absolutely don't believe in is extremely painful."

Head of ceremonies Tana Wollen said: "People like the idea of celebrating life rather than committing to God."

Meanwhile undertaker Robert Hickmott, the sixth generation of the Grove Hill Road-based family firm said: "I think Father Ed is making a point. Non-religious funeral services are increasing and yes, people do choose Tina Turner, but a lot of families don't really know what they want."

Warning of the danger of funerals "declining into a collage of different bits," Canon Jim Stewart of St James' Church, in the parish adjoining St Barnabas', said: "I once led a service for a young woman which included so much of her favourite music that the family found it very hard to cope emotionally, and I don't think that's helpful."

Mr Tomlinson, whose 14-month-old blogsite has just topped 100,000 hits, said this week that he stood by his comments, warning: "The move away from Christianity has left people with a lack of choice. Life is slipping through their fingers."