1,000 sign up from Tunbridge Wells to have affairs using website
TUNBRIDGE Wells has been laid bare as an infidelity hotspot by a controversial website.
Nearly 1,000 love rats from the town are said to have signed up to a website which helps married people meet new lovers.
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We spoke to one local adulteress who has been cheating on her husband for nine months.
She said: "It's a self-esteem boost when you get lots of messages from people wanting to get to know you."
The 40-year-old added: "I definitely don't want my marriage to end. I'm not sure what I would do if I got caught."
Leading local church figures have lined up to condemn the Illicit Encounters website, which shamelessly boasts of being a "discreet and confidential extra-marital service".
Father Leo Mooney, of St Dunstan's Catholic Church in Southborough, said marriage was "the building block of society".
He added: "I don't think people nowadays take marriage seriously, they don't take sex seriously either."
The Rev Giles Walter, whose St John's Church in Amherst Road offers marriage courses, said: "It's very sad that people would go down this road. We have hundreds of couples sign up [for marriage courses], some of whom may well have had an affair if they had not been given help."
Relationship and psychosexual therapist Joyce Walter was surprised by how many people in the town had subscribed to Illicit Encounters.
She said: "It would be my hunch that it would be more men than women who are members of this site and are cheating.
"Women tend not to be so casual about sex."
The website even carries a startling disclaimer, warning visitors that "not everyone is suited to having an affair".
"Not all affairs have a positive effect on a marriage," it adds.
The website claims to have 944 members from Tunbridge Wells, while across Kent more than 11,000 people are using the site to cheat on their other halves.
Full story pages 6-7
2 Comments
by Frank, TUNBRIDGE WELLS
Monday, November 01 2010, 11:21AM
“This article assumes fidelity to mean only having sex with one person at a time when this Christian definition of marriage is clearly not right for everyone ¿ especially non-Christians. It also assumes that only the rigid Christian definition of marriage is the correct one and that anyone who does not subscribe to it is a sexual failure and to be pathologized by scientific-sounding pseudo-sex therapy.
Extra-marital affairs from rigidly-defined Christian marriages are often a way out of marriages that could never have worked. They can be an excellent means of the very self-discovery Christians try to deny their adherents in order to better and more easily control their lives. Once the self is discovered, the Christian way of doing things soon comes to be revealed as no more than a superstitious cult offering no answers to life's existential problems ¿ only a refuge from them. Christians spend so much time interfering in others' sexual choices that most cannot work out whom they would like to have sex with so end-up having soulless sex. If Christians were not so sex-obsessed, these problems would not arise.
Moreover, Whites claim that only marrying for love is a valid reason for getting married. Yet, how many people actually do this rather than marrying because they do not want others to think them gay, or for money or for regular, unpaid sex?
Christians introduced politics into the bedroom by claiming that the anus is not to be sexually penetrated, the vagina only so long as you do not enjoy it and the mouth they are not too sure about. Christians want political power (to compensate for their non-existent spiritual power) but can only achieve this by colonizing the minds of its adherents with nonsense like homosexuality is an abomination and masturbation a sin; explaining why there are so many sex-starved White Christians. Anyone poking their nose into the sex lives of others is not only emotionally-suppressed and envious but also confuses the personal with the political because they are so lonely that they want to legislate for love. And if they cannot obtain that, to legislate for obedience to their own sexual perversion: Erotophobia. (Is this why so many White women are unfaithful?)
The reason Western marriage has failed is that most people are simply not monogamous and because non-monogamous marriages are not lawfully-contracted in the West. The inability of Whites to be truly multicultural and diverse ¿ even to their own sexual advantage ¿ is writ large here in their being willing to put up with marriages that do not work for the sake of form. No wonder so many married Whites look miserable.
To claim that marriage is the 'building block of society' is nonsense since this is simply talk about Christian marriage and Christian society which does not explain why Whites have the highest divorce rates in the world along with even higher adultery, porn-consumption and prostitute-use rates. Like all resentful Christians realizing that the Christian message of unhappiness-is-next-to-godliness, Father Leo Mooney claims people do not take marriage seriously when, in reality, it is only Christian marriage they do not take seriously. Like everyone else in the world, Whites take sex very seriously; they just want to enjoy it more and refuse to see it as just procreational. Recreational sex can be great with one partner or more of either sex ¿ there need be no exclusive love present for this to be the case.
Joyce Walters is clearly a charlatan and offers no statistics to support her claims. Although she is right that married men (75%) are more unfaithful than married women (40%), in their lifetimes, women in the UK have more sexual partners than men which disproves her claim that: 'Women tend not to be so casual about sex'. Her role here is to pathologize those the Christians cannot punish directly (since adultery is no longer a UK crime) by claiming they are mentally ill, when it is really those Ch”
by Anon, TWells
Friday, October 29 2010, 4:20PM
“To Joyce Walter - what makes you so sure that mainly men would cheat on their partners? Ah yes because all women are faithfull and virtuous of course none of them are manipulative or dishonest.
Please keep your stupid and unjustified opinions to yourself”